Woo Your Wife (Your Boss, Your Family)

Eliminate worry and start living… HAVE FAITH!

I’m shocked at how many people choose to live in a state of worry and doubt. This produces stress, causes illness and ruins opportunities for ‘success’. Stop worry and doubt NOW! Instead, HAVE FAITH!

Have FAITH! As a letter written to the Hebrews stated 2000 years ago,  “faith is assurance of things hoped for, a conviction of things not seen.” Note the keywords ASSURANCE and CONVICTION. Get rid of doubt. Shun uncertainty. This is the REAL ‘secret’.

Have FAITH in God. I KNOW He exists. I have conversations with him regularly throughout every day of my life. Unlike friends, employers, clients, even extended family, HE has NEVER let me down or gone back on a promise.

Have FAITH in yourself. Over the past half century, I’ve met ‘captains of industry’ and top performers in hundreds of fields. They posses incredible FAITH in themselves, their abilities and WORK HARD, applying all their abilities and passions to their careers.

Have FAITH in the organisation employing you. If you cannot believe with conviction in your organisation, it’s time to move on! You are no good to it or to yourself. If you DO have FAITH in your organisation, you will naturally work harder, longer, more effectively and be an inspiration to others.

FAITH is a MUST have, MUST use, MUST live-by tool for success. Stop worrying and doubting. Have FAITH!

Smile maker: Englich words and their daffynishons.

Avoidable: A bullfighter’s goal.
Baloney: Your shin.
Burglarize: What burglars see with.
Counterfeiters: Workmen remodeling kitchens.
Defeat: Under de-knees.
eclipse: English on-line barber shop.
Heroes: Fisherman in a boat with no motor.
Misty: Tiger Woods creating a divot.
Selfish: Wet market. Also sells meat.
Subdued: Navy guy in submarine.

Got comments or questions about “Have Faith”?  Just leave your comments here.

Join other Success Minded People by subscribing to the “Success Series Blog Tips” and GET the eCourse for FREE.

Join Michael’s Success Tips on Facebook

End Entitlement

Nothing is more frustrating than people who think they are entitled… to anything and often everything. Thoughts and statements like, “I’m a citizen so the government OWES me.” “I’m their son/daughter so my parents OWE me.” “I work here so the company / organisation OWES me.” Fertilizer!

Nobody owes anyone anything unless there was a signed agreement to that effect. Without such an agreement, there is no obligation.

Unfortunately, there is a pervasive belief in society that governments and employers owe people a living, a certain standard of living or that parents owe a regular allowance, paycheck or support to adult children. Not true. People in their 20s can quit a job they ‘don’t like’ and are allowed by parents to go home and play video games, living there rent free. Who owes them such a living? No one! Parents provide for their children until they are old enough to make it on their own… then they should be ON THEIR OWN… to grow up and mature.

Workers who surf the Net or are constantly texting family and friends on company time believe they work hard so the company owes them that time. Untrue! Show me where any employment contract says you can take company assets (you) and squander them.

A religious leader caught in the act of adultery told his counsellor, “I did everything for God and my people. I just did this ONE THING for ME.” Another more famous example, Tiger Woods in his ‘admission’ said “I thought I could get away with whatever I wanted to. I felt that I had worked hard my entire life and deserved to enjoy all the temptations around me. I felt I was entitled.” In both cases, there is no such entitlement!

Alternatives:

Responsibility. Standing up for what you have a legal right to and demand your rights be preserved. Beyond that, take personal responsibility for all your actions and consequences.

Parents: Demand your children over age 21 take responsibility for all their actions. Make them pay rent and earn a living if not in school. (you can always gift it back to them when they buy their own place.)

Students: Learn all you can and challenge every idea shared that does not sound or feel right. Do NOT let phones or games get in the way of your education or relationships. WORK while going to school and learn the responsibility which comes from earning your pocket money and school fees.

Employers: Make your policies clear on personal email, texting, phone calls and surfing and enforce them. In Singapore, Human Resource Magazine reported the average worker in Singapore skives 1 hour and 35 minutes a day with personal matters. That is 6 weeks of lost productivity… STOLEN, every year… PER employee.

Employees: Be responsible, work hard, get your work done by the agreed upon quitting time and GO HOME. Shut off work calls and be with your family. (unless of course you agreed to take calls 24/7)

Citizens: Demonstrate responsibility to the government by not just complaining, but getting involved at the grassroots level and help bring about change. Make suggestions and back your ideas with supported evidence.

I know some of this may sound ‘radical’ and ‘contra-culture’. No apology from me. Just because society led by social norms, television and permissiveness pervading our society says something is ‘okay’, does not mean it is right or even the best way to function. The current belief of entitlement is wrong and harmful for society. I believe we are better than that. I believe we must earn what we get in this world and give our fair due. No one owes anything they did not agree to nor should they expect what was not promised.

Smile maker: What do you think?
In our teens and 20s, we care so much about what others think about us.
When in our 30s, we stop caring what others think about us.
In our 40s we simply wonder what they were thinking about us
In our 50s, we finally discover, no one was thinking about us at all!
Got comments or questions?  Just leave your comments here.

Join other Success Minded People by subscribing to the “Success Series Blog Tips” and GET the eCourse for FREE.

Join Michael’s Success Tips on Facebook

Do you control your mobile phone and MP3 player or do they control you?

I was reading Jeff Davidson’s blog a couple of weeks ago and he shared a New York Times article on how people could no longer appreciate each other’s company and even at a wedding dinner, were texting constantly instead of enjoying the meal, the wine and chatting with the other guests.

On the plane last month from MPLS to Tokyo, I sat next to a top Amway leader who told me her son went to a ‘silent rave’. I asked her what it was. She said, “They all gather for a party to dance but there is no music. Each person listens to their own iPod music and they dance by themselves in a group.” No partners. No music in common. No FEELING the pulse of the music as a group. No cheering and clapping at the end of an awesome song. Just the need to gather but doing it all alone. Sorry… I find that bizarre!

As studies have shown how cellphone use impairs driving the same as having 2.5 drinks of alcohol. Bluetooth does not make a difference. Governments need to impose fines equal to drink driving for cellphone use in cars.  This would make the roads safer.

Companies sell ‘cellbusters’ which block the signals of cellphones for up to 50 meters which should be installed in theaters and fine dining restaurants but laws and cellbusters don’t stop people’s bad habits, they just make it easier for the FEW of us who prefer the silence or going to a movie and watching the screen instead of a hundred tiny glowing squares in front of us.

A big shift: RARELY now do people talk on their phones in my seminars. But many start texting. Mentally, they have left to another world. They are mentally going back to the office and lose connection with the seminar. What a waste.

Are your electronic devices controlling you and your life? Have you lost the ability to start a conversation with a stranger, maintain an interesting dialogue with your friends or sit and chat with your family for a full day WITHOUT feeling the need to text or call someone else?

10% of those under the age of 25 have electronic addition according to recent studies.

I do own a cellphone but do not even know the number. I cannot get email on it. I pay $18 for a SIM card with a fixed 18 minutes and it lasts me for 3 months or more. Some days (maybe 3 in a row?) I don’t even turn it on. Have lunch with me or attend a 2-day seminar by me and you have my undivided attention as does my wife and our children when I’m with them.  I might lose $50k worth of business a year (estimate) because of this approach to my business and my life but I believe the life and lifestyle is worth it. Can YOU say the same or are you ADDICTED to your phone and MP3 player?

SUGGESTION: Switch off mobile phones and MP3 players for one full day a week. Benefit: You will improve relationships and get more done. If you miss it too much and NEED it… maybe you are already addicted!

Got comments or questions?  Just leave your comments here.

Smile Maker for the week: You KNOW the food at a restaurant is bad when…
Customer:  Waiter… this food tastes awful. I want to talk to the manager.
Waiter:  Sorry sir… he’s out to lunch.

I shall conduct another 2 rounds of public seminars for SIM in Aug and in Oct/Nov respectively.
Check the below links for details:

Proactive Time and Stress Management (Aug 9-10, 26-27 Oct)
How to Manage, Motivate and Lead a Winning Team (19-20 Aug, 28-29 Oct)
Facilitation Skills: Conducting Meetings, Trainings and Facilitations by Getting People to Share THEIR Ideas (23-24 Aug,  1-2 Nov)
Training, Mentoring & Coaching: Upgrading People For High Performance And Productivity (25-26 Aug, 3-4 Nov)

Join other Success Minded People by subscribing to the “Success Series Blog Tips” and GET the eCourse for FREE.

Join Michael’s Success Tips on Facebook

The two most dangerous words for your finances

We work hard to make money and then two words (one a contraction) squander our hard earned money and burn our future. The two words: “It’s only”

These two words devastate families and futures because they so insidiously work their way into our daily lives and our perceptions of what we ‘must’ do. Here are some examples:
“It’s only $6 and I really enjoy it.” referring to a designer coffee once a day. Crunch the numbers! $6, 5 times a week is $1,560 a year. In 30 years if you were to invest that amount monthly at 8% interest comes to $96,000! And ‘It’s only’ coffee! (7,200 cups of coffee at $13.33 per cup)

I make my own coffee and drink (too much) about 6 cups a day for $.50 a day. That’s 65,700 cups of coffee for $22,500 (8% interest) or $.34 per cup of 100% Columbian coffee.

“It’s only $300 a month for a maid.” Not true! In Singapore, if you add in taxes, levy, annual trip home, food, misc., it is about $1000 a month. Over 30 years at 8% interest, that is $1,500,000. For one and a half MILLION dollars, can you wash your own dishes and keep your own home tidy?

“It’s only $600 a month for a car.” Maybe that is the car payment, but that is not the cost of owning the car. Taxes, license, petrol (‘gas’ to North Americans), service, repairs, parking and misc. will bring you to $1200 to $2500 depending on the amount driven, country, etc. In just 5 years, that is $88,760 to $184,916 at 8% interest. In 30 years, a new car every 5 years will cost you  between $1,800,000 to $3,750,000. (buying a 2-year-old car and driving it 8 years can cut your costs by 30% to 40%)

Because we live in Singapore where public transport is so easy and cheap, we spend $450 a month on transport for a family of 4. Over 30 years that costs us $675,000, a savings of $1,125,000 and it is better for ecology.

It is no wonder people have to work so hard and long for so many years… or should I say, ‘It’s only’ a lifetime.

YES… sometimes cars and maids are a necessity. But is everything we buy a necessity? Are there cheaper, more cost effective options? Do not fall into the two word trap… It’s ONLY! Better to hang on to what we make and invest it wisely.

Smile Maker:  Maids work…
Woman of the house: “Did you clean out the refrigerator like I asked you?”
Maid: “Yes mame… everything was delicious!”

Got comments or questions about “Its’ Only”?  Just leave your comments here.

Join other Success Minded People by subscribing to the “Success Series Blog Tips” and GET the eCourse for FREE.

Cheesecake Training

The Art of Persuasive Communication

Have you ever wished you could share information in a way that really motivates the listener to act, to buy or to use you and your services? It’s not secret. It’s just The Art of Persuasion.

The Art of Persuasive Communication

There are volumes written on the subject, but let’s break it down to 3 basic components.

First, what is your unique proposition or point you are trying to get across? Want a travel agent to carry your package or use your service? You need to prepare some valid reasons why your service, product, package AND why YOU are worth more or will bring a higher return. Do NOT tell the people listening to you all the details or all the facts. EVERY travel supplier will do that and you will just another lump of ‘something’ in the rojak.  Instead, focus on what the listener will get out of using your services or how much more they can make with you; how much easier it will be to resell your product or service. For example:

What can you do that no others can do?

What have other travel buyers loved about what you are offering? Who is paying more for similar offers in the industry but getting less?

How will the listener end up with more money, time, power, love, praise, joy, satisfaction or recognition by listening to you and buying what you are offering?

For example, we worked with Cragun’s Resort and Conference Centre in the USA. Their #1 complaint from travel agents was that they had no golf course while their top 5 competitors each owned a course. We got them thinking and in we determined that guests staying at one of their competitors needed 5 to 10 minutes to drive to the golf club from their lodging. For Cragun’s, it took them 5 minutes to 18 minutes to drive to ANY of their competitor’s club houses.  In an instant, they went from not having a golf course to offering 5 of the best courses at a discount. Their growth was exponential. They now bought out a competitor and built two more Trent Jones golf courses on that site.
Spending a few minutes to several hours thinking about what you have to offer and coming up with tangible answers will help you form a better and more unique proposition. If you can’t think of a unique proposition, you will never be able to persuade an intelligent buyer.

The second point is that communication is about both listening and presenting. Talking too fast, too slow or too much, can ruin a presentation. Likewise, emphasizing the wrong points or not emphasizing the key points can be disasterous. If you want to persuade others to use your service, work with you, support your team or follow your lead, think SET: Show – Emotion – Tell.

SHOW what you want to get across visually. PowerPoint®, posters, pictures, props, brochures, video. ANYTHING visual. 35% of the population are visual learners and will be persuaded if you can show them visually what you want them to agree to.

Then TELL the listener the reasons why it makes sense. Explaining every slide, graph, prop in detail, but not minutia. 25 % of population are persuaded in auditory terms.

Connect the SHOWING and TELLING with EMOTIONAL stories or reasons to trigger a response. “The last person I shared this with ended up with a nice ang bao to bring home to his family because…” Catch the drift on emphasizing some personal profit someone else received and if visuals and the words support the EMOTION, you have a pretty good chance of persuading the listener.

The third point, in ‘sales terminology’ is simply to, “ask for the order.” Never say, `What do you think?` That is cerebral. You want them to act. Best: “Then, with your approval, I will go forward with this so we can begin making you money; improving your selection; helping you win market-share; improve team morale as soon as possible.” It is assumptive and closes the communication.

Caution: Do not accept, “Let me think about it.” or “I will take it under consideration.” These are the same as NO! If someone wants to think about it, say, “Wouldn’t it be better to think about it while I am here so if you have any questions, I can share the reasons why you should…?”  or, from my friend Jeff Thull, “In other words, NO!” It is usually as hard for someone to say `no` as it is to say `yes`. If they say `no`, always ask `why` and push for specifics. If they have a valid reason, at least you know why. If not, it gives you another reason to push again for their agreement.

Learn the secrets of argumentation and persuasion to ensure results.

I will conduct a fantastic course and one-on-one coaching on public speaking this July.

Public Speaking as easy as ABCD!
Public Seminar in Singapore with Michael Podolinsky CSP

Seminar : 22 July 2010 (Thur) 9am – 5:30pm
One-On-One-Coaching : 23 July 2010 (Fri) 9am – 5pm

Registration starts at 9am and Training starts at 9:30am

Venue: PSB Science Park Building, 1 Science Park Drive, Level 1, Singapore 118221
Map: http://www.tuv-sud-psb.sg/images/img_abtpsb_PSBCorpMap.jpg

Brochure: http://pstinstitute.com/files/Public-Speaking-as-easy-as-ABCD-Brochure.pdf

Sign Up Now! Early Bird Ends 28 June!
Click Here to Register Online.

To make payment by cheque or money order, please download the Registration Form.

Got comments or questions about persuasive communication? Just leave your comments here.

3 Ways to Solve Problems

If there is one thing we all have in common, it is problems. Problems with work, family, finances, friends, career… there seems to be a never ending supply of them. Solving other people’s problems always seems easier than solving our own. Hence, I have a career. Here are 3 of my personal secrets for solving other people`s problems to help you solve yours.

1.  Listen. Just like I listen first to what people are saying and let them talk themselves out, listen to your own self talk. What are the particular verbs you are using to describe your problem? If you are saying to yourself `I hate this.` , remember that `hate` is a powerful emotion and will colour your judgement. If your self talk is, `It confuses me to…` think of why you are confused which is usually from not understanding something. Go back and learn what you need to know so the confusion is lessened.

2.  Come up with more than one alternative option. If you only see 2 options like the tide is in or the tide is out, you have not thought through the problem. The tide is only `in` 2 times a day for one minute each time. The rest of the time the tide is coming in or going out. Problems need more than the obvious in or out, high or low, buy or sell solutions. When you think of at least 5 viable options, now you understand the problem well enough to start to take action or make a recommendation.

3. Take action based upon your gut, not long deliberation or relying on massive detail. Harvard Business Review reported how decisions based upon a gut feeling were better than those based upon mulling over reams of data. Further, decisions are better when there is only a limited amount of information. The more detailed and trivial the information, the more likely we are to focus on the wrong thing. Finally, those who sleep on the decision let their subconscious minds work on it and that is where the creativity happens. The conscious mind possesses very little creativity.

Solving your problems in life still will not be easy. These three tools, however, will better equip you for tackling the next problem to arise. `Hmmm… eat Chinese or Italian for lunch.`

To have your team learning lessons like this and others to improve their relationships and to boost their productivity by browsing through the links below:

• Browse through Michael’s Products, Speech Topics, Seminar & Workshop Topics and  Public Seminars
• Check out what they say about Michael
• Click here to contact Michael to find out more about his training

In addition to training, we speak at conventions, conduct strategic planning retreats, sales meetings and facilitate sessions to optimise leadership development, team growth and personal productivity.

Got comments or questions about how to solve problems? Just leave your comments here.